No, I Didn't Lose A Bet (or "How I Became An Arizona Cardinals Fan")

People who know me know I am a huge fan of the Arizona Cardinals, possibly even moreso than I am a fan of the Kentucky Wildcats. It’s debatable, at best. Given that I live in southeast Kentucky, which is a 1,884 mile hop-skip-and-jump from Glendale, Arizona, a lot of these same people have asked me why I chose to root for the Cardinals.

It started in the summer of 2006. I had been following the NFL for about 14 years, and had never declared allegiance to a team. The “local” team is the Bengals, since Cincinnati is about 2 hours north of us; Nashville and Indianapolis are both within 3 hours. There was a brief period from 1999-2003 where I followed the Cleveland Browns, since the quarterback was Tim Couch, of UK fame. It wasn't so much being a huge fan of the team as it was being a huge fan of Couch. The downside to this, besides being a Browns fan, was watching the team shit all over everything Tim Couch did. He had no offensive line, only one good receiver, and a mediocre (at best) running back. Despite all this, he still managed to get them to the playoffs in 2002, breaking his leg in the process and being replaced by Kelly Holcomb.

So, Cleveland was out, and I needed a new team. I had one stipulation for myself: no good teams. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t going to be considered a bandwagon fan, especially given the overwhelming presence of Red Sox caps after the 2004 World Series. I called a friend to help me, and we made a list of all 32 teams, immediately crossing off all the good ones. Just for good measure, I also eliminated the Bengals and Titans. After this, the Eagles and Dolphins went, since I had other friends who followed them. We eventually narrowed the list to four teams (two from each conference): the Saints, Chiefs, Jaguars, and Cardinals.

The Saints were scratched off the board first, if for no other reason than the hideous logo and color scheme. Granted, I did feel a bit guilty about that, since this was just months after Hurricane Katrina. Next to go were the Jaguars, because they don’t have any fans at all, and I didn’t want to be the first. That left the Chiefs and Cardinals. A buddy of mine from Oklahoma was a big Chiefs fan, and I’ll admit there are few scenes as pretty as Arrowhead Stadium on a sunny afternoon, when the entire crowd is wearing that brilliant red. But that still didn’t do it for me. Wanna know what did? Matt Leinart.

Yeah, that guy. And I’m wincing as I write this. But Matt Leinart is the main reason I’m a Cardinals fan. Here was my logic: the guy was All-everything in college, had the skills and the pedigree, and a long-sucky franchise drafted him to be their man for the next several years. I was thinking I could get in on the ground floor, watch him make Arizona a winning team, and not have to worry about being a bandwagon-jumper. Now, I wasn’t a big fan of Leinart in college, but I really enjoyed watching him play, and I honestly thought he could win at the next level. But more than anything? We are both left-handed. Yes, my allegiance comes from the fact that I write with the same hand as a guy whose NFL career is best known for pictures involving a hot tub, a beer funnel, and several gorgeous women.

While Leinart was the tipping point for my decision, the new stadium had a lot to do with it as well. I was familiar with how miserable Sun Devil Stadium was for the team, and thought indoor facilities would make a difference. Thankfully, I was right. As a throwaway point, my favorite NBA team of all-time is the ‘92-93 Suns, so I figured what the hell, let’s go with Phoenix again. It also helps that I have hated the Cowboys since the early ‘90s.

Looking back, I don’t regret my decision a bit. That first season was a bit rough, as it included an 8-game losing streak, as well as Dennis Green’s infamous meltdown after the team blew a 20-point lead to the Bears on Monday Night Football. Next year was the first for Ken Whishenhunt, and it was readily apparent that the mindset in the desert was changing. As for Matt Leinart, I hate how things turned out, and I even resented Kurt Warner for a short period of time. Thankfully, I only gave about $40 for my Leinart jersey on eBay in 2007.

There are also some other things to be proud of, first and foremost Pat Tillman. While the circumstances around his death are cloudy at best, it takes guts and principles to do what he did, and I almost feel guilty that I wasn’t a fan of the team when he made his decision. Hell, I feel guilty just using his patriotism as a reason to be proud. On a much less meaningful note, the Cardinals are also technically the oldest team in football. And aside from Leinart's shenanigans, no negative behavior is associated with the team. On the contrary, Larry Fitzgerald is one of the finest citizens the league has. Kurt Warner's philanthropy also speaks for itself. Even Darnell Dockett gets in on the action. I'm sure every team has a few upstanding guys, it's just nice to not have any dumbasses on mine getting arrested.

It sucks that I’m 1,900 miles away from my team, but I’ve been able to see them play every couple years. They won in Cincinnati in ’07, when Antrell Rolle had 2 interception returns for a touchdown, and would’ve had a 3rd had it not been for a penalty on the return. In ’09, they lost in Tennessee, when Vince Young led the Titans on a 99-yard drive in the final two minutes, hitting Kenny Britt in the endzone for the winning touchdown. The team plays in Cincinnati again this season, but the game is on Christmas Eve, so unless I convince my family that football is more meaningful than holiday traditions (it is on certain levels, but that’s a different post), then I will be watching that one on TV.

I guess I got lucky. I picked a crappy team to root for, and they made the Super Bowl 3 seasons later. The Cardinals are just good enough to enjoy rooting for, and just bad enough to make each season a roller-coaster ride, and isn’t that suspense one of the best parts of being a fan?